A Heap of Teh Dead Voles

by CarlD

Thanks to the inexorable passage of time, accumulation of idle curiosity, the most excellent Historiann, and my undying ambition to outdo my friends the über-narcissists at Perverse Egalitarianism, I have a wondrous gift to bestow on you, oh peerless reader: a wealth of random useless information about this blog! Yay!

First, you should know that if you’ve been following along so far, you are officially a Genius according to The Blog Readability Test, which purports to measure the reading level required by a blog. Congratulations, I knew your perspicacity was commensurate with the discursive space of this text:

blog readability test

Next, it might interest you to know that according to the Genderanalyzer it is 76% likely that this blog was written by a guy! Phew. Only 24% of that pesky fem residue left to flush out and I’ll be man all man. (I think I must have picked up some points on all those Palin posts, or maybe they helped on the Genius bit.)

For those of you with cash in your pocket and flagging interest in the stock market, might I suggest a nice blog to add to your status portfolio? According to the Business Opportunities Weblog, mine is a real bargain (I blame that Genius thing, a real two-edged sword that) (cool, the sword metaphor’s got to get me another boy point or two at Genderanalyzer):

My blog is worth $12,419.88.
How much is your blog worth?

Finally, the Typealyzer was kind enough to sort me onto the Myers-Briggs scale. As performed on this blog, I am apparently an INTP “thinker,” helpfully described thus:

The logical and analytical type. They are especialy [sic] attuned to difficult creative and intellectual challenges and always look for something more complex to dig into. They are great at finding subtle connections between things and imagine [sic] far-reaching implications.

They enjoy working with complex things using a lot of concepts and imaginative models of reality. Since they are not very good at seeing and understanding the needs of other people, they might come across as arrogant, impatient and insensitive to people that need some time to understand what they are talking about.

Aren’t you done reading that yet, dumbass? What’s so hard to understand about concept-orientation, dingbat? (Yay, more boy points!) Actually, I find that if I turn other people’s feelings into a puzzle and go all aikido I’m able to simulate empathy quite well. But because we “thinkers” tend to jump from project to project once we’ve achieved mastery, not for long.

Finally, you may be fascinated and even underwhelmed to learn, thanks to the narcissizing free WordPress blogstats, that in about eight months of operation this blog has pumped out 92 posts; stimulated 297 comments (errrrummm, counting my own); attracted 7,136 pageviews; and blessedly dodged 696 spams, with one currently awaiting my cold hand of fate. Does anyone know if a nearly 3:1 spam-to-comment ratio is good?


9 Comments to “A Heap of Teh Dead Voles”

  1. I think our blogs are contributing to the general inflation of true meaning of the word “genius”…

  2. No doubt. Unless the point of that rating is “It would take a genius to find any shred of value here.” Or perhaps the term is meant in the original Latin sense, as in “This blog could seriously use a guiding spirit – won’t you please help?”

  3. Can you really put a price on “genius?”

  4. I wonder what the other classifications are there besides “high school” and “genius”?

  5. Yes, and I believe College is one, but I don’t know if they distinguish between Graduate School and Genius; or between Adjunct, Professor, Endowed Chair and Genius, for that matter.

  6. Carl – Now that my interview is done, I am catching up on my blog reading. I had to try your gender analyser, which informs me that my blog is 90% likely to have been written by a man. So if you still need some hints as to how to flush out that fem residue, apparently I’m your guy…

  7. What are you implying? That I need HELP? Hahaha, I laugh at your help.

    Congratulations on your own hypermasculinity. Hearty backslap and all that.

  8. Update: I just re-ran the gender analyzer and reading level. My masculinity number has gone up to 99% (take that, NP!) while my reading level has gone down to “college.” Which seems about right.

    Knowing what I know about how college dudes select topics when given options, I suspect that merely mentioning Hitler in my last post accomplished both degradations.

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